Perseverance and Endurance
Time always seems to move differently in the summer. Maybe the sensation is a holdover from our younger days, being on school break. Or maybe it’s the longer hours of daylight and the otherworldly heat that envelops Tel Aviv in August. This summer, the tension of the war and the suspense of the last weeks has stretched and compressed time even more than usual. Somehow, long days add up to short months and we are approaching a year since the events of October 7. In the midst of this time of tension and pain, we encounter Tisha B’Av.
This year, much of Tisha B’Av feels sickeningly close: the destruction, loss, pain, sense of abandonment. But in two ways, I’m having a difficult time connecting with Tisha B’Av this year. First, it seems almost cruel to have to mark this day, this year. We have endured 10 months of facing daily loss and destruction. Do we really need to dedicate a day to sadness and tears? Isn't there enough brokenness around us all the time?
More than that, Tisha B’Av calls on us to recognize the cause of the destruction of the Temple – what the rabbis and sages call sinat hinam, baseless hatred. It was our own internal strife that led to destruction and loss. If it feels unnecessarily dark to have a day dedicated to sadness, to talk about sinat hinam this year, in the face of October 7, feels dangerously close to blaming the victim. There are deep, painful and dangerous divisions in Israel right now. And we should talk about them and do everything possible to heal them. It is no exaggeration that our lives depend on it. But intertwining that conversation with mourning the losses on October 7th calls for delicate handling and it all still feels too raw and ongoing to be ready for that.
There is one element of Tisha B’Av that I am connecting with more readily this year, and that is fasting. When I lived in the United States, I sometimes fasted on Tisha B’Av. I haven’t done so since moving to Israel. While living in the U.S., I found meaning and connection in the practice. Now that I’m living in Israel, I find meaning in reading Megillat Eicha (the classic text of Tisha B’Av) in public spaces in our own sovereign homeland.
This year, I’m again drawn to fasting, or maybe more accurately to the experiences embedded in fasting. This year, as I think about resisting the impulse to eat and drink, of controlling something as all-consuming as hunger, it leads me to think about the power of determination. Fasting calls on us to overcome some of the most intense, physical, survival-driven urges. It requires us to break our most fundamental routines and find strength and fortitude. If we can overcome an urge as great as hunger, we know we have within us the power to endure fierce challenges. And there is a power and confidence that develops when one makes it through. Having passed one obstacle it is easier to believe in one’s ability when the next challenge arises.
Through fasting, or another exercise of perseverance, may we take this opportunity to connect with our strength and ability to overcome – even if just for a day or a moment. We aren’t instructed to fast forever, just for the day when it is needed. When Tisha B’Av ends, the pain around us will still be here. When the fast ends, may we take with us some wisdom, resilience and readiness to reach into ourselves and our traditions and withstand that pain.
Marcie Yoselevsky is a member of BINA’s External Relations team. Marcie moved to Israel three years ago. She has found and made her home in Tel Aviv. Marcie grew up in New London, Connecticut, and lived for many years in New York City, working in the Jewish and modern dance communities.
